DATE AND TIME: Friday, March 8, 2024 · 7am – 3pm PST

Eventbrite Link

A Couples Healing Journey with Tami Chelew, LMFT: Applying ISTDP with Couples

A One-Day Online Training on Friday March 8th.
Price: Early Bird through Feb 8th: $195, Regular: $225
Times: 7am-3pm PST, 10-6pm EST, 4pm-midnight Europe

For those interested in learning how to effectively apply the powerful method of ISTDP to couples, you are invited to witness a couple’s healing journey after years of painful disconnect towards relational repair and restoration.

This one-day training will showcase the depth of healing and growth between a couple where both partners experience an opened and unlocked unconscious which brought hope and healing, restoring their marriage and family.

A crisis in their marriage brought them back into therapy which mobilized their will to face what they have historically avoided. This crisis was the conduit for their ultimate personal and relational transformation.

By identifying and restructuring painful syntonic entanglements of their own intrapsychic dynamics, it was necessary to offer a trial therapy to each of them individually first, before continuing to address their interpersonal conflicts together in couples therapy.

You will witness portions of their personal trial therapies following the central dynamic sequence with capacity-building efforts, as needed. This facilitated several breakthroughs and extended unlockings of their unconscious. Repressed memories, feelings and forbidden impulses brought multidimensional structural and character changes in both partners with successful outcomes in their trial therapies.

We will then witness the healing power in their couples session as two partners with an open, unlocked, and undefended unconscious; each able to be more conscious of deeply understanding themselves, their histories and their relational dynamics.

You will witness both willingly taking personal responsibility for their conflicts, turning against their defensive patterns, speaking honestly and openly, experiencing their painful remorse for hurting the other, extending embodied loving compassion and forgiveness to heal and repair their relational attachment wounds. These healthy changes offered new found hope and renewal in their commitment to one another.

A true testament of transmuting their habitual and hurtful coping strategies through restructuring self-defeating patterns and unconscious anxiety pathways. Through restructuring repression and numbness, the male partner was able to obtain feeling back in his arm, cancelling an upcoming surgery.

We look forward to an inspiring day together as we witness the change processes unfold. We are so grateful for their consent in sharing their healing journey with all of us, along with their wish to support therapists to learn how to effectively work with couples from an ISTDP-lens. Their story is a testament that there truly is beauty from the ashes.

In this training, we will demonstrate the following teaching points in working individually with each partner and together as a couple:

1. How a crisis can mobilize both a patient’s will and their unconscious.

2. Assessing psychodiagnosis in each partner by determining what is on the front: feelings; unconscious anxiety pathways/thresholds; and dystonic/syntonic defenses, while monitoring the rise of complex feelings by activating both the conscious and unconscious therapeutic alliance.

3. Restructuring both regressive and repressive defenses to include acting out behaviors with substances and behaviors of betrayal, co-dependency, compliance/defiance, externalization, projection, avoidance, depression, repression, rumination, shame, self-loathing, healing sexual trauma in both, conflicts around faith issues, and a spiritual awakening for him.

4. Capacity-building with repression, smooth muscle, and CPD using the graded format of ISTDP with bracing and recapping interventions.

5. Using the Immersive Technique for building capacity to tolerate the felt experience of guilt, grief-laden feelings and love.

6. Activating and following the UTA to harness the healer within each of them.

7. Profound character changes both individually and collectively as a couple resulting in their four children being positively impacted for the better. Their potential being realized as a marriage and family are restored.

8. Two year follow up with the couple sharing their continual enduring changes with heart-felt gratitude after many failed attempts with previous therapies.

This training is exclusively for licensed mental health and registered health professionals, including Psychiatrists, Psychologists, Social Workers, MFTs, Counselors, as well as Physicians, Nurses, Physical Therapists, etc. If you are not a mental health or health professional, you may not attend due to the protection of patient confidentiality. Students and trainees pursuing licensure or registration as a mental health or health professional under supervision are welcome. The course content level is Intermediate level.

Reduced rates are available for group registrations and those in certain lower income countries. Email for details.

6.5 Continuing Credits are available for this event through R. Cassidy and can be purchased for an additional $25 here: (Link to be added soon). Participants must have paid tuition fee, logged in and out each day, attended the entire webinar, and completed an evaluation to receive a certificate. Failure to log in or out will result in forfeiture of credit for the entire course. No exceptions will be made. Partial credit is not available. Certificates are available following course completion at There is no conflict of interest or commercial support for this program.

Schedule (in PST, add 3 hours for EST)

7-8:30am Introduction and didactic presentation

8:30-8:45am Morning break

8:45-10am Case presentation

10-11am Lunch break

11am-12:45pm Case presentation

12:45-1pm Afternoon break

1-2pm Case presentation

2-3pm Questions, reflection, discussion

About the Presenter:

Tami Chelew is a licensed marriage and family therapist with an active practice in Solana Beach, California. She works with individuals, couples and families in ISTDP. Tami is also a certified supervisor in EFT for Couples and a dually certified therapist in AEDP and Transformative Couples Therapy. Tami is currently the President of the International Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy Association.

Tami has had the honor to be invited to present her clinical work locally, nationally and internationally. She offers supervision to trainees in EDTs for the past 12 plus years and offers monthly couples consultation. She is the co-creator of ISTDP San Diego Community; offering ISTDP trainings to other therapists in helping them become more effective at what they do.

For further inquiries for Presentations, Consultation, Individual or Couples Therapy or Couples Intensives, you may contact Tami by visiting her website at